Right.
Here’s my sermon for today. If it doesn’t make perfect sense to you then you are a fool.

Decadence. Now there’s a word that’s gone right off course and exploded in all the wrong places. You hear it all the time nowadays and it really gets me irritated. Here’s what the excellent Wikipedia has to say about the word;
Decadence generally refers to the supposed decline of a society because of moral weakness. The favourite example of this is ancient Rome, where, the story has it, a great empire was laid low by wicked emperors like Nero. However, the more dissolute emperors (Nero, Caligula, etc) ruled hundreds of years before the end of the empire

Right. So, if you are bathing in liquids that you can’t afford, poisoning your close relations or appointing your domestic animals into positions of power, then there is just a possibility that you may be decadent and that your grandchildren will be paying the price. Or at least some very strange vet’s bills.

Steven Berkoff’s excellent play Decadence hits the spot. Here we see two couples, one a pair of pampered rich fools, eating, drinking and fucking themselves to death, the other a pair of brainless working class sluggards, too lazy and stupid to turn the TV off and go out and take what could be waiting for them.
In both cases, we see people who are going no place but downhill.

South Africa under the white regime was decadent. A stupid, brutal system based on vanity, greed and total disregard for reality. Deep down, the whites knew it couldn’t last. But they did it anyway. Now the bastards all live here in New Zealand, honking away in their horrible accents about how bad it is now they have to wash their own dishes and mow the lawn.

I first got a bee in my bonnet about the misuse of the word decadence when I hired the video of Restoration. It’s a half way decent movie about a doctor during the reign of Charles the 2nd. Because you can’t make a film about this particular monarch without touching on the fact that he had a lot of sex, (and I mean a LOT. He still holds the record for the greatest number of illigitimate children spawned by a British King) the film makers decided that here they had a great example of a decadent society to entertain us with. They even used the word on the cover.

Well, bollocks to that say I. What was so decadent about the Restoration? Not a lot as far as I can see. After Britain’s only attempt at having a Republic, which everyone was glad to see the back of, the country had a King who encouraged science, the arts, and a flowering of ideas and principles that remain with us to this day. Under his rule we saw the work of Hooke, Boyle and Newton in the sciences, as well as the architectural work of Christopher Wren.
So he got laid a lot! Who cares? Apart from letting his idiot younger brother inherit the throne, he left the country in better shape than he found it and there’s nothing decadent about that. Besides, the advances made in governance during his reign made it possible for said idiot younger brother to be tidily deposed.

Now, by this stage you are probably thinking; “Blimey! I only looked in on this site ‘cos I’ve got a couple of spare kidneys and the rent needs paying and here’s this bloke rambling on about decadence. What’s his problem?”

Good point. Lets get down to the real business in hand. What really annoys me about the frequent misuse of the word is how readily we accept that a spot of healthy excess is bad and that we are bad people for giving into it. Example;

Fatuous dullard scans dessert menu and lights upon description of Black Forest Gateau, complete with nice stuff involving fresh cream. Even if the menu doesn’t mention the word decadence, the fatuous dullard will. “Oooooh ! That sounds decadent!” they will blither.
No it doesn’t. It sounds like a fucking chocolate cake. Stop trying to lay the stupid guilt trip on yourself and just order the damn cake. Firstly, you’ll enjoy it. Secondly, the person who made it will get paid, and people who make Black Forest Gateau deserve to be rich. Society is not going to crumble because you ate a bit of cake. Now grow up.

The trouble is, that these days there is a creeping tide of Puritanism oozing over the civilised world and we need to wise up and stop it in it’s tracks. Every time we think about doing something fun the thought of all those thin lipped prudes that can always give you a reason for not doing things comes to mind.

Whether it’s some con man in a pulpit or a fraud in a doctor’s white coat wagging fingers at us about our behaviour, the answer should be the same. The big ‘Eff Off!’
Stop worrying about your bloody waistlines, your smoking or your drinking or any of a thousand other fun things that people you don’t even know seem so uptight about.
Here’s your homework for today. Drink booze. Eat enjoyable foods. By all means smoke if you wish. Get laid in the way that suits you best. By this time tomorrow, you’ll be happier for it.